Moments

Whenever we would come home here to visit I would always have people talking to me about all the things the kids were missing out on by not growing up in the United States.  At the time my answer was always looking at the cup as half full by talking about all the fantastic adventures and experiences that they were going through because they were in another country.  I still agree wholeheartedly with my answer but I can also see, for maybe the first time, the glass half empty side of thinking.  Life has moved on while we were gone.  So much has happened that we were not a part of-kids that have grown up, people getting married, babies being born, folks that have died, lost jobs and new jobs, and the fact that we weren't here for that journey creates a distance.  And now I expect to bridge that gap in a matter of days...I am realizing that it isn't going to happen that quickly.  Relationships need time to get back to where they were before.  It makes me sad, but I am trying to understand.

Right now we are all missing Garth.  He is still in CA working with Perry and Sandi Bradford at the MK re-entry seminar.  For a family that has been together all the time, almost every day, for four years it is very strange to be split up.

I have started to look at my day more as a series of moments.  If there is something bad or uncomfortable that I am in the middle of, I tell myself that soon, this moment will be gone and I won't be at this place any longer -  I can handle this for a little while longer.  And a great moment, like today at the park when the younger kids were playing on the playground and Wyatt and I were playing soccer, I think about how soon this moment will be gone and I will never have it back.  Ever.  So I look around and try to imprint that image on my brain so that I can hold onto it a little bit longer.  Emma was snuggling with me before bed and said, "This was such a great day."  I agree.  We sure didn't do anything fancy, but we hung out and played together.  These are the moments they will remember.  Days like this help us not feel so "homesick" for Indo.  They help make the transition a little easier.

We are working on adjusting-one moment at a time.

Love you

Rachel