Rest

I know that people talk about how God is not a floodlight illuminating the entire path before you but that He shines a light at the foot of your path.  Well, for me lately it seems like He is shining the light for just one step at a time.  Someone like me wants to run ahead to see what the answer to all my questions is: How are we going to get all the support we need?  If we get accepted by Barnabas it won’t be until Sept.  What do we do until then?  How will we manage a mortgage?  Do we need to get jobs? What do we do about a vehicle?  We are supposed to leave for New York for a family reunion on August first-how are we going to get there?  What are we going to do about medical insurance now that we are in America?  Will we really be approved for a loan for that?  Who would give a loan to someone with no income?  What about all the expenses of starting the kids in school?  What about dentist appts?  Dad just had surgery on his wrist…how can we help him with his recovery?  This is what my mind was racing through last night as I was laying in bed-kind of like a car coming toward you that you can’t stop.

I kept remembering a verse I read the other night when we did a presentation for church-Ps.62:1  “My soul finds rest in God alone…”  I need to keep in mind that He is my rest, not whether or not everything is going exactly the way I want it to.  I don’t need a life with no trials.  I need to remember that I have a God strong enough to lean on when they do come.  Like the song “Leaning on the Everlasting Arms.”  I think about the awkwardness of hugging someone that you don’t really know.  There is space between you and it doesn’t last long.  But what about the hug you give someone that you deeply love and haven’t seen for some time.  You are tight, there is no space and it lasts as long as it can.  That is the way I have been clinging to God these last few months.  There are so many scary unanswered questions but I know that He has never left me hanging and I am never forgotten.  God is good.  All the time.  All the time.  God is good.

Please pray for me to slow my mind down and find my rest in Him.

Thanks

Rachel

Manure

I was thinking about all of the cruddy things we do - impatient replies to people we love, talking bad about the person driving in front of us, judging people when we don't know the whole story, saying No when we could have said Yes, holding grudges, being mad when we don't get our way (that is me time and time again).  I picture a clean me standing by a big lake full of cow manure.  Each time I am selfish and throwing fits it is like a handful of manure gets dropped  on me.

Day after day year after year until there is no more me showing, only this enormous mountain of stinky cow poop.  It would be tough to look at that and see something beautiful, something with potential.  But God saw us, He saw me, in my worst state and said, "I love you.  I really, really do.  You are so special to me, and I am going to make something amazing out of your life."

I have been reading in Ephesians and it talks in chapter 2 about how we were all trying to gratify the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts.  BUT BECAUSE OF HIS GREAT LOVE FOR US He made us alive in Christ...He raised us up...seated us in the Heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order to show us the incomparable riches of His grace!!  So I am no longer controlled, or covered in sin.  I have been seated in the heavenlies -Now I need to act like it.

I am so thankful that He saw potential in that pile of manure, aren't you?

Love you-

Rachel

Dog

Found a dog today!!!  How funny.  Last week we were at the park in Delavan and Emma found a nice cell phone.  We took it to the police station so hopefully the rightful owner was found.  Then today, Wyatt found a dog.  He was outside doing some exercises for soccer and a cute little dog came walking down the street.  It had a collar and a leash on so we figured it had an owner nearby.  We have been praying for a dog or puppy for 12 years so the kids were pretty excited that maybe God was bringing one to us.  Sophie named it and started teaching it tricks.  The rest of us went knocking on some of the neighbors' door. After calling the police and the animal shelter we found the owner.  Interestingly enough he asked if we wanted to keep it.  Can you believe it?!?  He is looking for a nice home for this little guy.  I told him that Garth is not here and I could not make a decision like that without him.  Sophie said, "Mom, we could surprise Daddy!"  But I don't think that would be a great idea.

We have been praying for a dog like a lab that would be big and friendly with a wonderful temperament with kids.  This little guy was definitely friendly but we are not sure if he is the dog for us.

At dinner tonight the kids were telling my Dad this whole story and remarking on how we found a cell phone and now a puppy.  Sophie decided that she wants to find an Ipad next.  Hahaha!

Wouldn't that be a hoot?

Love you

Rachel

Moments

Whenever we would come home here to visit I would always have people talking to me about all the things the kids were missing out on by not growing up in the United States.  At the time my answer was always looking at the cup as half full by talking about all the fantastic adventures and experiences that they were going through because they were in another country.  I still agree wholeheartedly with my answer but I can also see, for maybe the first time, the glass half empty side of thinking.  Life has moved on while we were gone.  So much has happened that we were not a part of-kids that have grown up, people getting married, babies being born, folks that have died, lost jobs and new jobs, and the fact that we weren't here for that journey creates a distance.  And now I expect to bridge that gap in a matter of days...I am realizing that it isn't going to happen that quickly.  Relationships need time to get back to where they were before.  It makes me sad, but I am trying to understand.

Right now we are all missing Garth.  He is still in CA working with Perry and Sandi Bradford at the MK re-entry seminar.  For a family that has been together all the time, almost every day, for four years it is very strange to be split up.

I have started to look at my day more as a series of moments.  If there is something bad or uncomfortable that I am in the middle of, I tell myself that soon, this moment will be gone and I won't be at this place any longer -  I can handle this for a little while longer.  And a great moment, like today at the park when the younger kids were playing on the playground and Wyatt and I were playing soccer, I think about how soon this moment will be gone and I will never have it back.  Ever.  So I look around and try to imprint that image on my brain so that I can hold onto it a little bit longer.  Emma was snuggling with me before bed and said, "This was such a great day."  I agree.  We sure didn't do anything fancy, but we hung out and played together.  These are the moments they will remember.  Days like this help us not feel so "homesick" for Indo.  They help make the transition a little easier.

We are working on adjusting-one moment at a time.

Love you

Rachel

Biola

Our day began very early-2:45 a.m. to be exact.  We were ready for the airport shuttle 30 minutes later, and off to the airport.  I must say that I don’t think it is fair that the Starbucks at the Milwaukee airport wasn’t open that early…I mean, Come on, people!  That time of day demands caffeine!  So because Starbucks was not open, and I really needed to wake up, Garth and I decided to play ping pong.  Did you know that there is a ping pong table set up in the airport near concourse C?  There is.  Notice the time in the first picture-3:53.  That is a.m. people.  Haha.  That was fun!

We flew to Chicago and then on to LA.  Perry and Sandy picked us up, took us to Panera, and then to Biola.  We have had a great time of meeting everyone and getting briefed on what to expect during this MK (missionary kid) re-entry program.  So strange that I haven’t ever travelled in California before and now I have been here twice in one month.

We are excited to be here and see what God might have in store for us in the future.  We are staying in the college dorms, and will eat in the cafeteria with the kids.  There will be 31 MKs coming to Biola starting tomorrow.  Barnabas has other programs being run right now in Seattle and Ohio.

If you see my kids in church tomorrow give them a hug for me and tell them I love ‘em.

See you soon-

Rachel

11 Days

We have officially been here now for 11 days.  Here are some of the things we are loving or not loving about being in America.

Loving

Being by family and friends

Being in our home again

Being back at Calvary

The variety in the stores (notice this is on both lists)

Stop signs and lights people actually stop at

White eggs that aren’t green and rotten when you crack them

Butter that is not from a can

Milk that is not from powder

The colder weather (This also is on both lists)

Carpet!!!

Emma is having fun doing laundry in real machines

Cale thinks the automatic faucets, soap dispensers and hand dryers in bathrooms are fantastic

No lizards jumping out at me when I open the cabinets

No rats in the kitchen

Jell-o, pudding, and cold cereal

Internet that works and electricity that stays on

Libraries and Parks

Cooking for a smaller crowd

Driving on the right side of the road

Cheese

TV (especially the commercials)

Not loving so much

Being away from friends (Emma cried herself to sleep again last night)

The variety in the stores

The cold weather

How dry it is, we miss the rain storms

No mountains and waterfalls we can see from our home

How far away the ocean is

How fast everything is (The pace of the people)

How expensive everything is

Wearing shoes

The kids are having a hard time getting used to American money (The Indonesian money system is in thousands)

Not being able to play racquetball

American Rice

I am sure the lists will get longer over the next few weeks.  Keep praying for us. 

Sixteen years ago today Garth and I got married.  Tonight we will drive to Milwaukee to stay somewhere near the airport.  Tomorrow at 3 am we will get up to get ready for our 5 am flight to CA.  We will be staying in the dorms at Biola and hanging out with the missionary kids there for a few days.  Pray that we are a blessing to them.  You can find out more about it by going to www.barnabas.org and click on the MK transition seminars picture at the bottom.

I will let you know how it goes.

Rachel

Our Next Step?

Here is something you could pray with us about.  Garth and I have been asked to consider joining Barnabas International and work in their MK (missionary kid) program.  Barnabas has an amazing ministry to kids that have lived in a third world country and are now coming to the States for college.  It is a HUGE transition ( I am finding out first hand all about that).  We would be instrumental in helping make that transition easier.  For many of the kids their family is still overseas and they don’t always have people to turn to for help.  We want to be there for them, like their extended family.  It seems like this would be a perfect fit for us.  We enjoy working with teenagers, we have been overseas, we are now trying to “fit” back into American culture and can use what we are going through to help others.  The fact that we would be able to work out of our home in Wisconsin is an added blessing.  One of the MK Re-entry programs is run out of BIOLA University in the LA area.  It starts this next week.  So, on Saturday Garth and I will fly there to see what it is all about.  I will stay until Tuesday and Garth will stay all week.  If we accept this opportunity, we would be taking over the program at BIOLA.  So it is great that we will have a chance to see what it is like.

I was only gone from the States for 4 years and we were able to come back a few times to visit.  Yet I am still feeling a bit like a fish out of water at times trying to adjust back to the American culture.  I am  normally a big planner, making lists, thinking way down the road to things that are coming up.  But lately I have found that thinking ahead feels overwhelming.  Thinking of getting clothes and shoes to fit everyone, eventually boots, warm coats, mittens…finding a vehicle that will fit us all, buying school supplies for the upcoming year, and backpacks, my parents moving out of the house and we are completely on our own again, getting my kids to wear shoes…UGH!  if we have to go to Wal-Mart I try to do a quick in and out because the selection and all of the varieties is too much.  I can’t imagine what it would be like for a teenager not used to this culture, here all by themselves, trying to figure out how to get their drivers’ license, learning American money, starting at college, buying a car, maybe finding an apartment…Anyways, we will keep you posted about all of this.

We would need to raise enough support each month to live off of, and figure out the best way for this ministry to fit with our family, so pray for real wisdom, o.k.?

Thanks!

Love you

Rachel

Happy Fourth!

How awesome to be in America!!!  And to celebrate the 4^th of July with fireworks, cookouts and family.  We went to the Independence Day concert at Calvary and the fireworks/water ski show at Grand Geneva.  Both were super!!!  The concert didn’t feel the same without Grandma Gigi in the choir and my Grandpa walking with the Marines…I am so proud of them, and miss them lots.  Dad did a fantastic job getting everything ready at Grand Geneva.  Way to go, Dad.  We had a blast!  In Indo they only do fireworks for Christmas and New Years.  I had Cale asking, “Mom, is it Christmas?”  Then the girls go in the port-a-pots at Grand Geneva and remark how nice they are.  (Just about anything is better than those squat pots in Indo.) 

Today we had a barbeque at my sister’s.  We grilled out and enjoyed tastes we haven’t had for awhile.  Italian sausages, hamburgers with real beef, hot dogs, pickles, and ice cream cake.  But the real treat of the day was Jell-o.  It tasted so good.  How funny is that that we were excited about Jell-o?  Ha ha.

Happy Fourth!

Rachel

The Zoo

We finished up June with a great trip to the zoo with my sister and her daughter, my niece.  The heat on Friday did not bother us one bit.  It was so much fun, the kids had a blast and we were able to see so many animals.  My sister had free tickets and that made it extra wonderful.

We have had our share of snake stories from four years overseas so it was nice to see all the snakes at the zoo in cages.  The kids all fed the goats, watched the giraffes get fed, saw the impalas leaping over logs, two brown bears wrestling in the water, played on the playground, and got an ice cream cone from the Dairy store.  It was hilarious to hear Emma at one point tell me to quick get the camera.  When I came over to see what she was pointing at it was a chipmunk scurrying under a bush.  She was so excited to see a chipmunk again.

I forgot to post Days 10 and 11 of our journey to the blog earlier.  So I did it tonight.  Feel free to go back and look.